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Holding on to Life

by Drowner

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1.
Paralysis 00:34
2.
Sorrow 03:49
I drown in your pain (Nothing left to say I had to walk away) The bitter taste of suffocation The sickness you gave (Poison in my veins the conduit of pain) You feed on sorrow of your creation You wanna know what it's like To break from the inside You wanna know how it feels to hold something real Blurring the lines while I burn on the inside Held by a thread 'til it all comes back ('Til it all comes back again) Bind to my pain Repair the fractures in my face (in my face) Search for the strength 'til it all comes back again I slip from the edge (Close my eyes and descend I keep falling again) Can't stand this feeling, but can't replace it I can't see an end (Losing all my breath, so close to death) Don't know how much longer I can take it You wanna know what it's like To break from the inside You wanna know how it feels to hold something real Blurring the lines while I burn on the inside Held by a thread 'til it all comes back ('Til it all comes back again) Bind to my pain Repair the fractures in my face (in my face) Search for the strength 'til it all comes back again Again (It's all falling apart, it's all falling apart I put the blame on you, I put the pressure on me) It's all in your head Your head It's all in your head
3.
I think I'm losing my mind Slipping slowly on the inside It's nothing I can define It's what you learn looking through my eyes No matter how far I run it's never enough No matter how hard I try I can't trust love There's something deep inside of me that's going to break I can feel it It crumbles down (When held inside) I always falter (And say I'm fine) Relive the pain (sink my own knife) Live in the space between Holding on to life I think it's easy to see There's a piece of time lost within me Is it so hard to believe that I could find a truth to set me free? No matter how far I run it's never enough No matter how hard I try I can't trust love There's something deep inside of me that's going to break I can feel it It crumbles down (When held inside) I always falter (And say I'm fine) Relive the pain (sink my own knife) Live in the space between Holding on It crumbles down (When held inside) I always falter (And say I'm fine) Relive the pain (sink my own knife) Live in the space between Holding on to life
4.
Atonement 04:02
Free me from all the fear inside Let it fall away Breaking even though I tried To carry all the blame Finger on the pulse, hand around my throat Fashioning the mask to fit the skin Shadow in the dark tearing me apart Fade it all to black and back again Break the bond of mind and flesh Resurrect what's left Release Dispel I'll separate my fears from everything else (Kill my fears) Atone For the cynic inside me holding me back Darkness clouding All that I can see around me Fading Racing I feel decayed and descending In the space between death and life Where love spite become intertwined I am only a man who tried Giving all I have to keep me alive Finger on the pulse, hand around my throat Fashioning the mask to fit the skin Shadow in the dark tearing me apart Fade it all to black and back again Break the bond of mind and flesh Resurrect what's left Release Dispel I'll separate my fears from everything else (Kill my fears) Atone For the cynic inside me holding me back from release (Release) Dispel (Dispel) I'll separate my fears from everything else (Kill my fears) Atone For the cynic inside me holding me back In the space between death and life
5.
I feel enslaved As my convictions fall away This hate contained A symptom I could never shakee But I can feel it now (Welling up inside) I can feel it now (Now) Nothing was or ever will be Anything but a fading memory now Take it all away Burn the pages, feed the flames With every breathe I take I want you to feel my pain Think what you'll say I know everything, you're the one to blame I believed in you for so long Vindictive faith I feel every sting and carry the weight Still I believed in you for so long It's something strained The tensity's growing Like drowning inside And never knowing why Nothing left to sever in me Becoming more than jaded memories now Take it all away Burn the pages, feed the flames With every breathe I take I want you to feel, feel my pain Think what you'll say I know everything, you're the one to blame I believed in you for so long Vindictive faith I feel every sting and carry the weight Still I believed in you for so long I don't want to slip beneath this I won't let you be my weakness
6.
Defiance 04:32
Blameless emptiness Taking hold of what I am Moving on while I still can Violent defiance I've got nothing left to lose I've got nothing left to prove Sifting through all that's numb Searching for who I once was I wanna mend mistakes I wanna feel something Living through what dreams become Fractured glass reflecting love It never leaves while I'm awake All I feel is Blameless emptiness Taking hold of what I am Moving on while I still can Violent defiance I've got nothing left to lose I've got nothing left to prove All the memories I compart But I can't find them in my heart A silhouette of hope A dissipating ghost See my eyes turning dark Mirrored image falls apart I feel the blood rip through my skin I feel the rift collapse within (The trick is not minding that it hurts) I feel the blood rip through my skin I feel the rift collapse within Blameless emptiness Taking hold of what I am Moving on while I still can Violent defiance I've got nothing left to lose I've got nothing left to prove (The trick is not minding that it hurts)

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released March 12, 2022

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Drowner Portland, Oregon

Nu-metal from the PNW

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